“Mum, I saw a video of a 10-year-old girl dressed sexily”.

Jessie Liew SP
4 min readMay 18, 2023

Today I want to share an interesting conversation I had with my eldest daughter, Suen.

Suen is 13 years old.

Here is what the conversation looks like:

“Mum, my friend show me a YouTube video. In that video, I saw a young girl, I think her age is about 10–11 years old. She dressed sexily in that video”.

Suen told me and my hubby.

We were at the dining table, finished our dinner, and were just having a casual conversation with the kids.

Hubby said, “Hmm… is she selling something or doing some artwork or demoing something?”.

Suen said, “No, the young girl just keeps posing sexily”.

Suen continued, “It’s kinda weird she posed like that at her age”.

I am so glad that Suen manages to digest what she is exposed to, especially in the online world.

Of course, I installed parental software to filter those inappropriate content for her tech devices.

But here is the reality:

1) Little girl posing in sexily kind of videos can pass through as she still dresses appropriately, not exposing their private part.

2) I can’t prevent what her friend exposed to and shared with Suen.

That is why we need to instill critical thinking in our children and see if these contents resonate with them or are in line with their values.

I want to mention some statistics about the use of social media by our children.

In Sept 2021, a leaked internal research report showed that the use of Instagram can have a negative impact on the mental health of teenagers, particularly teenage girls. The report found that:

· Instagram can contribute to feelings of low self-esteem, anxiety, and depression among young people, especially girls.

· Girls in particular can feel pressure to present a perfect image on the platform, leading to feelings of inadequacy and negative body image.

· The report also suggested that teenage girls who struggle with these feelings are at greater risk of self-harm and suicidal ideation.

According to the Pew Research Center, 70% of teens say anxiety and depression are major problems among their peers, and 45% say social media has a negative effect on their mental health.

I remember back when I was younger, I don’t recall the need to dress sexily.

If the child feels the need to dress sexily, it is usually due to what they are exposed to.

Therefore, we need to engage our children in healthy conversation and know what are their mindsets, thoughts, belief systems, and habits.

Parents, it is time to wake up. These devices can do damage to our children too.

I always quote: The technologies / the Internet is a double edge sword.

If you use it in the right way, it can propel you to a better future. If you use it in the wrong way, it can destroy you.

It is the same as money. Have you ever been told that money is the root of all evil? However, we all need money to survive and sustain our lifestyles.

Money is just a tool. How you use it is up to you.

I have a webinar where I share 20 painful mistakes that Parents Regret Making In Their Child’s Screen Time and How to Avoid Them.

Here are the 20 mistakes.

Today, we cover

1) Mistake #6: Parents refuse to learn about Digital Parenting

2) Mistake #12: Parents underestimate the influence of the contents on their child’s mindset & behavior

If you are thinking that you do not need to learn Parenting In This Digital Era, you could be wrong!

We need to learn & adapt to parenting our children in this digital era.

To learn more, come to my webinar by registering at Free Webinar “20 Painful Mistakes That Parents Regret Making In Their Child’s Screen Time

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Jessie Liew is the founder of Digital Parenting Coaching and a mother of 4. Her previous career included working as a cybersecurity specialist, where she protected clients from the harmful effects caused by online hackers and predators. In her spare time, Jessie enjoys reading, playing games, and adventures.

If you would like to learn more about Jessie and her work, please visit her website at https://www.neverfightwithyourkids.com/.

You can also find her on Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn as Jessie Liew SP.

P.S. Let’s stay connected!

1. Join our Digital Parenting — Reducing Screen Time Facebook Group to get FREE tips and direct access to us.

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Jessie Liew SP

I help parents to empower their children to use the screen/Internet responsibly and stay safe online. Join my free FB group http://bit.ly/FBGRPDPC